DEVOTEE AND HIS FAMILY

Q. Suppose a wife tells her husband who is given to religious practices, ' If you do not look after me properly, I will commit suicide.' What should one do in that case ?

A. One should give up such a wife - the wife that stands in the way to God-realisation. Let her commit suicide or let her not! The wife who thus puts obstacles in one's path to God is an embodiment of Avidya (nescience). But then all become amenable to one who has a sincere devotion to God—even the king, wicked persons and the wife. If one has true devotion, then one s wife afso gradually turns Godward. If one is good-natured, it is quite possible that she too becomes good through the grace of God.

Father and mother are of prime importance to man. Unless they are pleased, no devotional practice will be of any avail. Look at Sri Chaitanya. Though mad with love of God, he took much pains to console his mother before he took Sannyasa. He told her, " Mother, do not be sorry. I will come now and then to see you." There are so many debts that one has to repay—the debt to the gods, the debt to the Rishis, and also the debt to the parents and the wife. No pious work can succeed unless the debt to the parents is paid off. There is a debt even to the wife. Harish is staying here, having renounced his wife. If his wife had not been provided for, I would have called him a wicked fellow. Ramaprasanna is always wandering about for milk and opium for the Hatha Yogi. He says that Manu has enjoined service to Sadhus. Meanwhile, his old mother is starving and has to do her own shopping. I feel so angry at this.

But there is one consideration. If a man becomes mad with love of God, then who is father, who is mother and who is wife ? He loves God so deeply that he becomes mad. He has no duty, he is absolved from all debts. When a man reaches that state, he forgets the whole world; he becomes unconscious of even the body which is so dear to everyone.

The parents deserve the highest respect in this world. As long as they live, they should be served to the best of one s capacity, and after their death, their post funeral rites ought to be performed according to ones means. Even if the son be the poorest of the poor, and has no means to perform the post funeral rites of his parents, he should resort to the forest and shed tears there, remembering his inability. Only then can he free himself from his obligation to them. For the sake of God alone, one may disobey one s parents without incurring sin. As for instance, Prahlada did not refrain from taking the name of Lord Krishna, although prohibited by his father to do so. And Dhruva went to the forest in order to practise austerities, even though forbidden by his mother. They had not done any wrong in this.